I wish I cared less: The Art of letting life be

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   When I was in school, I feared public speaking to death because I was not well versed in English. Most of the time I didn't get a chance to speak because our class was so large. But when nothing else worked out, I had to speak. Things often got worse. I worried like hell. I could not focus on other things for the time being. Along with this, another matter of concern was “my image”. If I fumbled or couldn't speak well, how would I face my teachers and classmates? Now I wonder, what a stupid person I was? How under confident I was? I worried about the things that are just a cakewalk for most of you and for me now.  What if I had been a little more confident? How much stress could I have avoided in my childhood?  Now I understand that it was all in my imagination ... .Instead of worrying, I could have focused on improving my English speaking. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and speak the way I do today? But, I know I can't. As the time and that platform a...
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The Magic Begins When You Become Your Own Best Friend

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Seven years ago when I was travelling through a metro train to cover a short distance to save my time, I got a wonderful piece of advice from a middle aged woman, who was sitting just next to me. She started to chat with me as soon as I boarded the train. In the beginning she asked me like what I do? Where am I going? What do I want to be in the future? After listening to my views, she suddenly took a pause of four to five seconds, then she told me “Whatever you want to do or become… . First try to become your own best friend.” 

At that time I didn't pay much heed to this advice, maybe I was too young to understand this or at that time I barely knew the concept of “self exploration”.

Now, after seven years and so much suffering from my own expectations, I finally come on the path of becoming my own best friend. Now I truly understand what the lady was trying to say. 

I think your life becomes different when you see yourself like your best friend. You become more aware about yourself, you know what to do? How to do things? You become compassionate towards yourself. You become less vulnerable to the ill wills of society. Above all of this “you have yourself for you”. 

You become consistent in things you do 

When you become your own best friend… “you choose yourself from yourself.” You are no longer driven by outside fantasies. You no longer seek validation from others. Your dreams are exclusively yours. In a way you bring out your authentic self. 

Because now you are driven by your own instincts. Now you have your exclusive dreams to work upon. Now you listen to yourself. Now you have no self doubts and your complete focus and dedication goes towards your goals. Now you rely upon yourself. Now you have your best friend, who never lets you down, who never thinks bad for you, who never lets you fail in life. 

And this brings nothing but consistency in your studies, your job or whatever you are trying to achieve in your life. 

Things that are stealing your precious time quietly

You filter out unnecessary people and activities that are consuming yourself

When you have yourself beside you, you need nobody else for your entertainment. You need nobody else to accompany you. You need nobody else to go on a date with you. 

Rather you take your time out… to reflect upon things. You started to dig your inner self. You started to listen to your thoughts. You become closer to yourself. You started to filter out extras from your life whether it could be the people you hang out with or the activities you perform to keep yourself occupied.

Because when you get close to yourself you get clarity in life. You know where to focus. You put your energy and time in things that gave high returns. That built you. 

Then you do not follow motivation or discipline rather you build a system. A system that keeps you floating irrespective of how strong the waves are? 

What happens when you cut off negative people from your life

You become compassionate towards yourself 

We are our worst critiques. We blame ourselves for bad events in our lives. We curse ourselves for the things we are not able to do. We become our worst enemy, who sees only bad things about us. We forget about our achievements, our goods and remember only drawbacks. 

But, when you try to be close to yourself. When to become your own best friend. You started to treat yourself like your own best friend. You advise yourself like you advise your best friend. You see good things about yourself. You started to recognize your struggles like you recognize your best friend. You uplift yourself in tough times and keep yourself humble in success. 

This happens because you practice compassion towards yourself like you do with your best friend. Now you see yourself as a completely different individual from your mind. That's why compassion becomes your thing in life. This we realize only when… . We become our own best friend.

Beware what you carry on your shoulders

You top priority is you

Being friends with yourself brings “awareness”. We know our best friend quite closely. We know what food she enjoys? We know which dress suits her best? We know what makes her happy? We know what she loves to do? 

We know all this because friendship is our top priority. We focus on the people we love. We take care of the people we love. They are our priorities. 

So, when you become your own best friend you know yourself better. You know your priorities. You take care of yourself, because you love yourself. You do the things that make you happy because you know what makes you feel good? 

Your top priority is “you” only. You know what your inner self needs? You started to dress up nicely. You started to enjoy the meal you like. You started to explore the things that you wanted to experience for a long time. 

This all happens because you are your best friend. You know yourself like nobody else. 

Let go to grow: why letting go is essential for happier life

You become the best version of yourself

When you are your best friend, you do need other people to fill the emptiness in your life. You yourself is enough for you. You are at peace. 

Because, people not only bring negativity and comparisons in your life but also make you doubt yourself. They make you doubt your abilities and capabilities. They label you as a selfish, introvert ( though it is not a bad thing, but they label you because according to them you couldn't get along with others, irrespective of what you want), blunt etc. They simply took away your peace.

That's why being with yourself keeps you away from this shit. And make you focus on what matters. When you cut off toxic people from your life and when you become your own best friend. Everyday you focus on becoming the best version of yourself. Because now you have no shit to clean up. Rather you focus on becoming the best version of yourself. You spend all your energy and time nurturing yourself. 

And nurturing ourselves is the gift we can give to ourselves for becoming our best friend. 

Takeaways

All in all when you become your best friend you take the staring of your life in your own hands. 

Now you look up to yourself for everything you want to do or achieve. Now you no longer judge yourself harshly. Now you become gentle with yourself like you become with your best friend. Now you accept yourself, irrespective of what you have done to yourself or your hardships. Now you have your own shoulder to cry upon. 

Now you ride your own life bus. 


A letter to myself: About life, growth and Healing








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